Sunday, April 18, 2010

My love

Your eyes are navy blue. They captivate me.

Your ears poke out like my father's. Currently, you also share a hairstyle with him. I think you will grow out of that.

Your mouth has learned to smile and laugh naturally. You started laughing at your daddy yesterday and couldn't stop. You laughed until you gave yourself the hiccups.

That is one thing that I love about this house. More often than not, it is full of laughter. Granted, that means that your daddy and I are terribly silly people, but I think it might be a fun way to grow up.

Tonight, you took a bath with your brother. At first he was scolding you for kicking and splashing, but when you just smiled at his reprimand, he gave up and started washing your feet. He can be surprisingly sweet to you. Whenever someone asks him about his little brother, his standard reply is, "Colin. So cute."

You still sleep with us. Partly because there isn't anywhere else for you to sleep yet, and partly because you are so snuggly. You spoon perfectly, wake up to nurse a couple of times, and go right back to sleep. Usually. Occasionally, you want to stay awake and smile at me. If I have to stay awake in the middle of the night or wee hours of the morning, I have to say, I don't mind staring at your beautiful smile.

There is only one small complaint I have, and that is your hatred of the stroller. I love your stroller. You have a little hide-away compartment, and your brother sits in the jump seat above you. And. You. Hate. It. Unless you are asleep, you scream. Even when you are asleep, you usually wake up and then scream. Our long walks designed to help me burn this baby fat before you enter the first grade? Are torture for both of us. I would wear you, but you seem to hate that too. You just want to ride up on my shoulder and be able to look around at the world, cheek to cheek with me. It's a lovely feeling, cheek to cheek, but dang. You are heavy. I tell myself that I'm just working my arm muscles. Walking, pushing the stroller, and carrying you. Ridiculous.

You have such a sweet nature. Easy going. You like to be at home and nurse on your Boppy. As much as I don't mind nursing you anywhere, anytime, and here you are, just wanting your comfortable football hold where you and I can just gaze at each other. I have to admit, I like it too.

Today, you and your brother nursed together. We don't do that often, but today, you each latched on, and you stared at him. You hadn't ever noticed him before - even when he would stroke your head while you nursed together. But today, you and he locked eyes and I felt the urge to stop tandem nursing fall away again.

You are a big boy, you know. Not even three months old and you are already wearing 6 month and up clothes. I spent yesterday packing away two full boxes of clothes that you have already outgrown. I'm not sure what I will do with them yet.

I know that I will miss these tiny baby days. I feel them slipping away. But I have to say, I'm really looking forward to the things we will get to do when you can crawl and walk and run and talk and play and all of the amazing learning you have already started to do.

I'm going to try and write more. There is so much to say about you and your brother. I'm just not willing to do it at the expense of staring into those captivating navy blue eyes. You are my love.