What doesn't work

You've got a matter of hours to get the swimmers to the egg. Here is what doesn't work:

1. Waking up with a full onslaught allergy attack.

2. Rolling over to hubby to try for a little somepin' somepin' and have snot run out of your nose before you can sniff it back up.

3. Sniffing snot up your nose while trying to say "I love you."

4. Trying to say "I love you" with a clogged head making it come out "Dih luf doo."

5. Realizing that seduction is out of the picture for you at this moment, it also does no good to pull up your Fertility Friend chart, point, pout, and wave a peed upon ovulation predictor stick in the air.

Bummer.

Now I guess I'm just going to lie around naked the rest of the evening and hope for the best.