Friday, April 17, 2009

Impostomom

The other day, a plumber stopped by the house to give us a quote for moving our gas line. After he was done looking around, he started to ask me a couple of questions about the logistics of the project. Before he could finish one of them though, he stopped and said,

"I'm sorry, should I be asking the couple that lives here these things?"

He thought I was the nanny.

Heather agreed with me that it's because I'm hawt, although I won't leave the door shut on the possibility that it was because I look stupid young with my hair cut like it is and running around in rock'n'roll themed t-shirts. Whatever.

That is how I feel when we are out and about some days. Like the nanny. I definitely feel like I'm the woman who knows the least about being a mom.

At the playground today, a new mom (new to the playground, not new with a newborn) joined me in the sandbox. Her little girl was a month older than Little Bird, and her son was three I think. Her children were lovely, and she was very pleasant. All that to make sure that what I'm about to say doesn't reflect on her at all. It was totally me.

I was so nervous talking to her because I felt like at any moment she would come to the conclusion that I didn't have a clue about what I was doing. You know, as a mom.

The thing is, I do have a clue. I actually have a lot of confidence that what I'm doing for Bird is good and right. I see him flourishing - signing, talking, problem solving, dancing, singing, figuring out how things work - and I am so proud.

I guess what it boils down to is that I don't feel like I know how to be "a mom," but I'm pretty certain I've got being "Bird's mama" down pat. I can be comfortable knowing that is where my expertise begins and ends. With my Little Bird.

6 comments:

  1. First, you are hawt -- and I always secretly hope that people wonder if maybe I'm the nanny (instead of the "advanced maternal age" mom that my OB thinks I am). And second, being Bird's mom instead of A Mom is part of what makes you a good friend -- you don't feel compelled to parent other kids or tell other parents what to do.

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  2. Hawt yes!

    And you know what? I think you're an awesome mom..

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  3. I also go through phases where I feel like I don't know what the heck I'm doing as a parent. Well, pretty much the entire first year I felt like that. Those phases are a lot less frequent as time goes on.

    Besides, like you said, you don't have to be a perfect Generic EveryMom. You just need to be a good mom to *your* kid.

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  4. Ah, you are a great mom!!! This mom thing is a learning process, we learn as we go. You my dear are doing amazing. Kicky, M, and your future rock stars are lucky to have you!

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  5. This is such a good post. I think as women, we so often wonder when we'll be "found out"--we feel like imposters as moms or in our jobs or whatever. Really, we just need to give ourselves more credit!!

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