Stop looking at me, Swan!

Tomorrow I leave for Blogher. I should be doing laundry and packing. Instead, I am here. Writing. There are a lot of should be's that I could list. I'll refrain though.

I don't spend a great deal of time in the sun. I had summers of high school that I spent at the pool slathered in baby oil. Now, I prefer to use some sunless tanning creme and not look 50 when I'm still in my 30's.

However. There are some days, when laying in the sun just feels good. Toasty warm.

My father-in-law stopped by today. He wanted to go to the pool. I thought it sounded like a dandy idea, so I packed up my book and my sunscreen and met him over there. After a nice easy couple of laps, I got out, dried off, and applied my sunscreen.

Then I read. For about an hour. Another couple of laps to cool off, more sunscreen, and a little more reading.

What I didn't realize was that I wasn't getting the spray-on sunscreen all over. I was just sort of creating stripes on my body. Remember Adam Sandler's Billy Madison and the smiley face on his chest created from sunscreen?

Tomorrow, I will have to get on a plane and meet people I "know" but have never met. And I have the most random sunburn you have ever seen.

I look like a cross between a woman and a red zebra. A drunk woman and a red zebra because my nose failed to acknowledge any sunscreen was ever applied to it.

So Mamma? When you are looking for me in the airport tomorrow, I'll be the drunk looking stripey woman. Not sure? Just check the tops of my feet to see if they are beet red. That will be me.