When you're having fun . . .

The pollen is out. I thought we were having an early spring with all this warm weather and sinus nastiness. Then I realized that it's April.

Where has the time gone? For months, it seemed like January would never get here, and now here it is April. And the taxes are due. Crap.

Next week, Guy will be in Korea. All week. Lovely will be at her mother's house. It will just be me and Christopher. And the dogs, of course. Every night this week, I've snuggled onto Guy's shoulder and waged a losing battle to fight back the tears. I don't want him to go.

Not only will I miss him, but I'm terrified of doing this baby thing alone. When it's 11:00 PM and Bird hasn't had a nap longer than 20 minutes all day but is still refusing to go to sleep? It's Guy that can get him snoozing. We have a bathtime routine that we do all three of us together every night. He gets up with the dogs in the morning and feeds them. He takes Bird while I clean up dinner and feed the dogs at night.

We have our thing. I don't know what I'm going to do without our thing.

Like pumping. Christopher somehow knows when I'm pumping and will pitch a royal fit until I stop. It doesn't matter if he just nursed. It doesn't matter if he's asleep. Somehow, it always happens that I can't pump unless someone else is watching him.

I need Guy. Or, you could just say that I really really want Guy around. Korea is not exactly around.

If anyone would like to come hang out with me next week, you are more than welcome. I'm not nearly the basketcase in person that I am when I write. Well, maybe I am. But you're still here, so I can't be that bad.