Monday, January 15, 2007

Puppies therapy and I'm still crazy

There are a lot of women in the circle of friends I have that are pregnant. They are more friends of friends really, so I don't have to see them unless I choose to see them. Let's be honest, I don't have that many friends. This one friend I do have, has a lot of friends and a lot of them are pregnant. That is much more accurate.

I spent some time with this friend on Friday. She has new puppies. What can cheer you up if it is not puppies and a good friend? They are so incredibly cute (the puppies and the friend). This picture is of the 5 minutes that they were actually still:
The other 50 I took are not so good. Well, except this one:

If that doesn't make you smile, you might be dead.

Anyway, our conversations had been centered around pregnancy. There was a friend in each month from March to July, and two in a couple of months, who were pregnant. She would tell me how each one was doing and then get my update as well.

Thank God for puppies. I can't explain it with any sort of logic, but I was dreading hearing about those women. Lucky for me, my friend didn't bring them up. I should have known she would know better. I just can't bear to hear about them and their happy appointments and cute maternity clothes right now. Maybe soon, but not yet.

The pregnant women I want to keep up with are here. Online. I feel safe reading about their pregnancies here in my little shell and am still genuinely happy for them.

I hope she doesn't mind, but I'm singling one out tonight. There is a website that most of you probably know about already called Babycenter. On Babycenter, there are bulletin boards where you can post with other women that are due in your same month. I shouldn't say this, but am going to anyway. There are a lot of young, not so smart people posting there. I know that isn't the nicest thing to say, but it's true. There was one woman though who kept appearing in the same threads I would explore. She would comment with intelligence, patience (if someone was being a moron), humor, and had great signatures. Surely she is a graphic artist. Or a photographer. Key word here though: artist. When I saw a link to her blog, I had to go. It got bookmarked and that was that.

We would have been due the same month next year. For the first few days after I lost the baby, I avoided that bookmark like the plague. Then one day I decided to check in. See how she was doing. She had posted about how annoying it was to have people bitching about the gender of their unborn child. You all know me. I left a snarky comment about how they should be so lucky (sorry about that, by the way) and somewhere in my head, I decided to keep reading.

So at the risk of being some sort of crazy ass stalker, I have decided to sort of adopt her blog. Follow her pregnancy. Take joy in each week that passes. Get excited about the good updates from the doctor. Wait for the belly shots. Wait for the July baby. Celebrate the July baby.

Maybe it sounds completely and utterly insane, but it makes me happy. Lately, that is rare, so I'm running with it. Here's to a happy healthy baby in July with a mommy who is kind enough to share it all with crazy internet land. Thanks for that.

Fertile Mertile