Thursday, March 20, 2008

One small step

Today I nursed my child in the waiting room at the car dealership. There were exactly four men, one woman, and one toddler in the room with me. Two of the men had just separately asked me how old Bird was and commented on what a good baby he was. That is because he had been asleep for almost an hour while we waited on the Jeep to be serviced.

Then he woke up. He wasn't supposed to do that. We were supposed to be in and out of there in time for me to get back home, collect my 83 pillows and lay down to nurse him. Unfortunately, there were more things that needed to be done than just the oil change I expected, and we were stuck there almost 2 hours.

Bird needed to eat.

So I fed him. I slouched down in my chair, getting as prone as I could without falling out of it. I put a blanket over my shoulder, which really was more a polite gesture than a shield, since I haven't yet mastered the trick of getting him latched on without both hands and staring down, waiting for the biggest open mouth he makes.

It wasn't the most comfortable thing I've ever done, but it worked alright. He fussed a little bit until I found a good spot for him, but then he did his bit. And when he was done, he came out from under his blanket and smiled at me. I felt like we had really accomplished something.

It seemed silly at the time - for me to be so proud of myself and Christopher for being able to nurse in the waiting room. However, tonight, as I read over the comments on the J&J post (Thank God some people still know where their caps lock button is. I was beginning to think no one knew how to use it anymore in this overly polite blogworld. I LOVE ME SOME CAPS LOCK), it occurred to me that it's not silly at all.

Bird and I have worked our butts off to even still be breastfeeding. Yes, STILL, at 8 weeks. I've been pretty tied to the house due to my insecurities of nursing and more recently, the need to be prone while doing so. I think that has something to do with how pissed I am at the audacity of suggesting a mother could just leave her 8 week old at home for a few days and pump. Or just don't go. JUST STAY HOME where you belong.

Today though, Bird and I joined the ranks of all the moms and babies before us WHO WILL NOT just stay home because they are nursing. We didn't go sit in the john to do it. We didn't move to the corner of the room to do it. We didn't blush. We didn't apologize. We just did it, and honestly? It wasn't that big of a deal. No one really cared.

It was only a big deal for me. It means that I'm one step closer to being able to get out more. I need that. All moms need that.

That, and the freedom to scratch that itchy CAPS LOCK pinky when you can't think of the right words, only some capitalized ones, to use.

19 comments:

  1. WhyMommy12:10 AM

    Awesome! Go, you!

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  2. Anonymous7:26 AM

    Congrats to you! With my first daughter, I could only manage to nurse her prone. I got so I really liked it-- it was a good excuse to go have some private time and lie down at the same time. I did eventually manage to nurse her sitting up, but it always worked better lying down. Turns out, I think, that the BABY liked it that way.. because with my second child, I NEVER nursed her lying down, she didn't settle down for it. In the rocking chair with the boppy. That's what worked with her. Funny. I never could nurse my baby as casually as some-- my friend Molly nursed her son while actively cooking dinner!!!!-- never a possibility for me. I never nursed in public (well, in my car...is that public?) not because I was embarrassed but because I couldn't get it to WORK! ha ha. And I nursed both girls until they were a year old. It really never was particularly inconvenient to remove myself to nurse, it's just the way we did it.
    Congrats again on 8 weeks of nursing. Good for you!!!
    CB in NY

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  3. YAY, YOU!!

    KEEP IT UP!!

    XO CGF

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  4. You go girl! Go on with your bad self!!!

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  5. Congratulations! I still remember the first time I breast fed in public. It's a momentous occasion.

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  6. WOOHOO Bird and Mama!!

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  7. Yea!!

    I remember how accomplished I felt the first time. :)

    There'll be no stoppin' ya, now!!!

    You're doing great :)

    j

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  8. Not a small thing at all, I'd say. Go you!! No, wait--GO YOU!!

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  9. For the record, not that you asked me, C...

    moi completely supports the rights of a private entity or organization to choose who/what to allow entry or membership. But a "Camp Baby" not allowing babies?

    *scratch scratch scratch*

    ...doth maketh no sense. Something about eliminating your target demographic comes to mind.

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  10. That is fantastic and definitely something to be proud of! Good for you chica!

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  11. Good for you guys!!!!!!

    I had the same public feeding fears during the 6 weeks I breastfed our son.

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  12. You, well you rage on with your bad self!

    Smooches.

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  13. That's so awesome! Congratulations! The first time NIP is completely nervewracking and such a "WOOOHOOO" moment at the same time.

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  14. That must feel great! WOO HOO! Awesome.

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  15. I'm so proud of you. I know too many moms who gave up on Breast feeding not because it uncomfortable (which many times it is) or their milk supply changed so they felt they didnt have enough milk (I nursed more, I made more or I took fenugreek) but because it was too inconvienent. What could be more convienent then perfectly formulated milk at the correct temp whereever you go? I do know that nursing in public for the first time was an amazing thing to me too (although I didn't do it often, I wasn't afraid to go out anymore). All those feeling of accomplishment came flooding back reading your post. Thank you for triggering those sweet memories.

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  16. ImpostorMom10:14 AM

    YAY! And you SHOULD be proud. That is is wonderful accomplishment. I remember the first time I breastfed Boog in public. We were at the mall and he woke up and got fussy, what else was I to do. I was nervous but I did it and I was very proud of myself and so was my mom who was with us. It gets easier and easier the more comfortable you get. Good for you!

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  17. Yay!!
    That's a GREAT ACCOMPLISHMENT, CANAPE!

    (Caps lock for enthusiasm!)

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  18. Oh man, have I been there! This is a nursing milestone to be marked, that is FOR SHO! Good work.

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